The National Quandary

The National Quandary

Area Man Promises Steak Tasted Great Despite Looking Nothing Like The Photo

Two steaks

TUCSON, AZ – A local man who tried a new steak recipe he found from an online food blog swears that it was the best he ever had even though it ended up looking like a piece of sweaty shoe sole.

Charlie Thompson, a self proclaimed marinade explorer, was first attracted to the recipe because of the prevalence of positive reviews. “I also already had the majority of ingredients on hand,” said Charlie. “I just had to borrow a teaspoon of five spice powder from my neighbor. I made a small substitution here and there, but for the most part, I was all good to go.”

Mr. Thompson said he followed the recipe down to the last detail, but was still unimpressed with how it looked after grilling. “I don’t know if it was the grill time or what. Maybe it could have been because I used regular Soy sauce instead of dark like the recipe asked. I tried to get those damn grill lines just like they do in restaurant ads. It came out looking like a gray sheep liver. Did they even use a steak in the picture? Was it plastic food art?”

Despite the unappetizing appearance, Thompson did try a bite and said that it melted in his mouth. While consuming the slimy looking cadaver, he realized that the majority of the reviews offered alternatives to the original recipe that he didn’t read. Apparently, those giving five star reviews were rating their own complete recipe and not the original as noted. He added that he would never be mislead in that way again.

Mr. Thompson did say he would attempt a second try at the recipe. He also reported that his wife passed on tasting it, adding that she thought she saw it breathing after uncomfortably poking it with her fork.

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