The National Quandary

The National Quandary

Nation Fondly Remembers Black Hole Guy

Stephen Hawking

Visionary theoretical physicist, Stephen Hawking, passed away last week, leaving a theoretical pit in humanity’s collective scientific reasoning. We took to the street yesterday to see how the public reacted to news of his passing.

“Yeah, I saw him on The Simpsons a few times.”, said convenience store clerk, Jaime Hodgins. “Smart guy, really smart guy. You’d have to be to wire yourself up to a Speak & Spell right? That’s dope as hell.”

Janelle Bates, a hairdresser told TNQ, ”Wasn’t he the Black Hole guy? You gotta be a bright light to figure that stuff out, but I bet he couldn’t do a box braid. Look at my girl La Qeesha over there. That’s tight!”

“Aww, your joking. He’s gone too?”, said Arnold James, a ping pong historian. “You know I loved his books! They really made you think. The Shining was great! Also read The Green Mile, The Mist, IT. Lot of others too. Sure am going to miss him!”

Many took to social media to air their condolences as well. Daphne Brooks, an Instagram influencer touchingly wrote, “There is nothing to fear but fear itself – Stephen Hawking. The world will miss your brilliance.”

Rest in peace Mr. Hawking. You are truly in a better place.

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